We Were Dreamers

I started reading this for a book club, but both failed to make it to the meeting and to finish this book on time, so I’m not entirely sure that counts. Then I failed to write the review for three weeks… so this is going to be extremely hazily recollected.

The book had loosely been on my radar, since I was familiar with Liu from his work in Kim’s Convenience, a genial show I enjoy putting on from time to time. The endearing thing about Kim’s Convenience is how easily it manages to capture the second-generation immigrant experience in the west, particularly for kids of Asian descent. The show is far from perfect, as Liu himself notes in later chapters, but it was at its start one of a kind—paving the way for more diversity of experience to be reflected in television. Liu’s character, Jung, is also a relatable one in that his relationship with his parents is extremely fraught and tense, a recurring point throughout the show.

This is a slightly strange concept for a memoir; the title is plural, ‘we’, and indeed the story follows Simu Liu’s parents for a third of the book, which initially seemed an odd choice. And then there’s the ‘immigrant superhero origin story’. Presumably, we take this to refer to the author, but he is quite young, and his ‘origin’ story is glossed over in some parts. The most compelling parts were where Liu describes his time in Harbin, as well as his parents’ rough upbringing under Mao and ability to persevere in spite of all of their hardships. I can understand his respect for what they did to get him to where he is today. However, as they say in writing a personal statement—you are writing about yourself, not your parents. While the first part about his parents was well-written and engaging, the parts focusing on the author’s own academic and occupational journey flipped back and forth a lot, with varying levels of detail and not as much emotional reflection.

Some portions were rather difficult for me to read, surprisingly. I’m not one to concern myself with trigger warnings, but I definitely got a greater appreciation for them while reading certain passages—notably, the ones dealing with Liu’s parents and how they treated him when he was a teenager, as well as his attitudes about his upbringing/adolescence. If you are still dealing with issues relating to immigrant parents, especially surrounding physical/mental/emotional abuse, tread lightly on this one, because it will get fairly dark at times. I didn’t think it would be an issue, but… it definitely had me tearing up at those parts and forcing me back to some dark memories of my own.

I was at times annoyed with Liu’s attitude. His writing style was intentionally humorous and light, and this was a refreshing tone for much of the book. Yet, at times, he took a self-deprecating route in a way that almost seemed kind of egotistical. I’m not entirely sure how to describe it, weeks later, but it just seemed like awkward self-aggrandizement while also trying to play his own mistakes down, in a way. I understand facing the consequences of poor decisions, or being forced away from what you want to do, but Liu kind of waved away a lot of his own efforts and swept some of his decisions under the rug. It would have been nicer to see him evaluate his thought processes from adulthood and his career a bit more, but as it is, we get a kind of brief play-by-play of the major up- and downswings of his career trajectory. All of a sudden, he’s a Marvel hero, and we see his shoddy beginnings in immortalized stock photos, but much of the middle is cursorily treated, if at all.

Moreover, we don’t really get an explanation of how his parents go from… well, disapproving of him at best to mildly tolerating his ‘passions’ and then being excited and enthusiastic about their actor son. It definitely took a lot of work on both sides, but we don’t get to see that in this book. For readers dealing with similar struggles, it doesn’t feel like it’s as much of a ‘guide’ in that regard as Liu wants it to be. On a more positive note though, I did appreciate him acknowledging how his friends and community have supported him, as well as how he came to appreciate Asian-American and Asian-Canadian actors in his journey of being more mindful about diversity in the industry.

Overall, this was a mixed bag of a book for me, and not necessarily as easy to get through as I anticipated. It had some compelling moments and interesting anecdotes regarding Liu’s rising star, but either as a memoir or a source of support for others in similar positions, I’m not sure the book is entirely successful. It would have made more sense for Liu to write this book with a little bit more weight to his experiences, or a chance to do a bit more reflection on what went well with these most recent upswings and the healing his family must have gone through. If you are curious about the discussion of Liu’s career, are a fan, or a child of immigrants, this book will probably have something for you; but if you aren’t already thinking about it, this isn’t necessarily a must-read.