Why the hell did I read this? I’m a 25 year old bitter adult with a grudge against hack writers like Patterson. This book isn’t for me. I’m not the audience. Teenagers are.

If there’s one thing I’ve always hated about Patterson’s work, it’s his trademark two page chapters. It makes the pacing of an already bloated and overwrought book unbearable to slog through. And on top of all that, the reader has to endure the most precocious and obnoxious narrators.

“Maximum Rider” reads like a 40 year old trying to take on the voice of a teen. Said narrator is surrounded by a gaggle of misfits including the black-clad edgily names ‘Fang’.

Reluctant readers in the pre teen age range would probably enjoy this ‘kid power’ story. Not me though, definitely not me.