I’ve put off writing this review. I’ve done this because this will be one of the hardest reviews I’ve had to write. It’s hard because to write it I have to admit something I’ve been coming to realize over the past few years: I am a racist.

I’m am not proud of this and I’m working to get past the comforting guilt that allowed me to put off writing this uncomfortable review.

I can give all the usual reasons and excuses to try to convince myself I’m not a racist: I was raised to not see race, I have many friends who are people of color, I voted for Obama! It turns out that these are the very reasons I am racist.

“Not seeing color” is a myth. In the first place, I do see color. It’s just that I couldn’t admit it to myself. I realized this a couple of years ago when a friend was talking about getting mugged. As we talked, I was shocked when I realized that I assumed that he mugger was black. As Eddo-Lodge points out “mugged” is a racially charged word. Nevertheless, this moment shows me clearly that I did see color. In fact, I made explicitly racist assumptions.

“Not seeing color” also has an impact on my friendships. I recently reconnected with a grade school friend. During a long walk he revealed to me that he had repeatedly experienced racist abuse during the seven years we were in school together. “Oh,” I stammered, “I didn’t know.” After an uncomfortable silence, we moved on to other topics. It’s stuck with me, and I’ve come to understand that the reason I didn’t see it because I supposedly didn’t see color. For seven years one my best friends was treated like shit by our classmates (and possibly by me?) and I ignored it; I did nothing to change things.

And I voted for Obama. I realize now was that at least in part I saw Obama’s election as a sort of end of history. At last we were past the difficulties of race, at last we could all be one! The last several years have shown how naive and ill-informed this hope was.

But enough of what I’ve realised. There are two things that Eddo-Lodge has given me: a better understanding of the history of race in Britain and an action plan for combatting racism both my own and others.

As an American, my understanding of British history after the American Revolutionary War is pretty shaky. I filled in some gaps after living here for 17 years, but Eddo-Lodge has given me a good start on understanding the history of slavery and colonialism. It’s also served as a useful primer on the Windrush generation and the Stephen Lawrence case.

In terms of action, there are three things I’m going to do.

1. Listen. I’ll spend more time listening. Particularly when I’m being told that my behavior is racist or that behavior I haven’t seen as problematic is racist.
2. Stop going along to get along. It’s far to easy to let racist statement or behavior pass. Worse still, it’s easy to passively participate innit b
3. Speak up. When I do see something that is racist, challenge it instead of remaining silent. Look in it as on opportunity to discuss and educate.

None of this is easy. I’m not nearly there yet.

It’s rare that I read a book that I feel everyone should read. This is one of those books. Read it. Have an honest discussion with the book and yourself. I hope that, like me, this look will change the way you see the world. I hope that it will make your life more difficult. Most of all I hope it will make you an anti-racist b