1) "Professor Dr Dr (honoris causa) (mult.) Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld came from a distinguished family about whom little is known, other than they had existed, as von Igelfelds, for a very long time. The obscurity of their early history in no way detracted from the family's distinction; in fact, if anything, it added to it. Anybody can find their way into the history books by doing something egregiously unpleasant: starting a local war, stealing the land and property of others, being particularly vindictive towards neighbours: all of these are well-understood routes to fame and can lead to immense distinction, titles and honorifics. Most people who today are dukes or earls are there because of descent from markedly successful psychopaths. Their ancestors were simply higher achievers than other people's when it came to deceit, expropriation, selfishness and murder. That none of these attributes tends to be recorded in family coats of arms is testimony to the ability of people to brush over or even completely ignore the saliences of the inconvenient past."

2) "'And here we have the Librarian,' said the Rector as Dr Schreiber-Ziegler stepped forward to shake his hand. 'Deputy Librarian,' said Dr Schreiber-Ziegler quickly. 'The Librarian is Herr Huber.' 'Of course,' said the Rector. And then, turning to Herr Uber-Huber, he said, 'Another Huber, you see, Herr Uber-Huber. Bavaria's teeming with people of your name.' 'Hubers, yes,' said Herr Uber-Huber. 'But not so many Uber-Hubers, I think.'"

3) "'What are you doing for dinner?' asked Dr Schneeweiss. 'After this, I mean.' Von Igelfeld looked at his watch. 'I am very tired,' he said. 'I was proposing not to have dinner.' Dr Schneeweiss looked disappointed. 'What about breakfast?' she asked. Von Igelfeld struggled. Was this the American way? Were they all like this? Very friendly and charming, but... 'I am not sure about breakfast,' he said quickly. 'I sometimes miss breakfast.' 'You have to eat some time,' said Dr Schneeweiss, playfully. Von Igelfeld laughed nervously. 'Very funny,' he said. 'Yes, very amusing.'"

4) "The University of Göttingen was proposing to establish a new Chair, with its own new department, and were seeking applicants. The Chair would be in linguistics, with particular reference to historical aspects of the Romance languages. The holder of the Chair would be entitled to twelve assistants and generous grants for academic travel. There were no specified duties, other than to pursue research at the highest level. Unterholzer looked up. 'This is very significant news,' he said. 'It's obviously a very prestigious Chair,' said Herr Huber. 'Only the very best appointments have no duties at all.'"