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Torrey Peters: Detransition, Baby (Hardcover)

Amy was disgusted at the way she craved approval through behavior that made her feel like a cosmic joke: an asshole with no self-esteem who wanted to be one of the girls so badly there weren't even the words for it, so she got close in the crudest ways instead.

Detransition, Baby by  (Page 131)

I wasn’t expecting to find such descriptions of myself in there… 😳 … and in ways I was incapable of understanding back then.