The Joys of Motherhood

Bernadine Evaristo described The Joys of Motherhood as 'the female, feminist counterpart to Things Fall Apart' by Chinua Achebe and, on reading Buchi Emecheta's masterpiece for myself, I could see just what Evaristo means. There are similar themes of traditional culture clashing with more modern ways of living, and rural life being very different to that of the city, and I couldn't help but feel for Nnu Ego whose prolonged experiences of motherhood were generally anything but joyful. Nnu Ego's struggles to reconcile city life with that of her rural village upbringing also brought to mind The Dollmaker by Harriette Arnow.

It was interesting to watch the dynamic between Nnu Ego and her husband, Nnaife, changing as their lives progressed together. Initially Nnu Ego looks down on her husband's profession as a washerman for a white household despite his obvious pride in the role. Once Nnu Ego begins trading and earning for herself however, and Nnaife's job is lost to the Second World War, their effective positions change while, psychologically, they still remain committed to the traditional hierarchy. I was shocked also at Emecheta's portrayal of Nigerian men being press-ganged into fighting for Britain during WW2. My own school history lessons gave the impression of many thousands of Commonwealth citizens eagerly signing up voluntarily. I now understand that this was not the whole truth.

While I appreciated this opportunity to read The Joys Of Motherhood and can completely understand why it is considered a modern classic, I wasn't particularly enamoured of Buchi Emecheta's prose which did feel overly slow. Perhaps this is due to it originally having been written over forty years ago and styles have changed a lot in the meantime. I didn't think that Nnu Ego came across that strongly in her own right which is, of course, a significant part of what the whole novel wants to put across, but I found it frustrating as a reader. This woman feels she exists only to do her best by her family and so puts the needs, and even whims, of her children and husband above everything else, regardless of how they reciprocate. As her situation degenerates, grinding her down too, I desperately wanted her to be less selfless. Nnu Ego's own pride in successfully fulfilling her traditional role to the very best of her ability would never allow her, however, to put herself first.

Ostensibly, The Joys of Motherhood is a story of a mother who loves her children and will do anything for them. Nnu Ego is born in rural northern Nigeria and moves to Lagos to marry her husband and start a family. The book tells her story from birth through her troubles, when she lives in near poverty for years raising children, to her husband's disappearance as a forcefully conscripted soldier in WWII. All of this is fastened to her relationships with her children, her husband and her father.

Weaved into the deceptively simple plot are countless critiques and analyses, focussed on traditional Nigerian values, modernity, patriarchy and the role of women, colonialism and its hold on Nigeria in the 20th Century, and the development of an urban/rural divide. All of this, and the novel remains funny, touching, sad and joyous at different moments. Emecheta is a story-weaver and her use of language remains easy and enjoyable while wrapping all of the critique in this space.

Buchi Emecheta's The Joys of Motherhood is a powerful and complex commentary on twentieth-century gender relations, urban and rural life, and tradition in colonial Nigeria between roughly 1909 and 1950. Emecheta is well-known for writing novels (mostly historical fiction) that speaks for women's freedom to marry, escape violence, and pursue education.

The Joys of Motherhood is an ironic title for the book, because the main character, Nnu Ego, realizes near the end of her life that she has found little fulfillment through motherhood. Instead, her children have grown and left home. Her two sons have pursued Western education and have "abandoned" Ego to her fate, and her eldest daughters have wed and live far away. Yet, the pursuit of motherhood is culturally groomed in traditional Nigerian Ibo society and is the only proper path of womanhood that Nnu ego recognizes during her lifetime. Other options gradually open to women in the book, as a supporting character, Adaku, (one of Ego's former co-wives) believes that education came become a path to liberation for women in Nigeria; an end to women's perpetual dependence on men.

That being said, many of the Goodreads reviewers have, I think, missed the crux of Emecheta's argument in this book by claiming she has written a book extolling motherhood. It's partly that, but it's also more complicated. Instead, for Emechetta, motherhood is temporarily and sporadically fulfilling for Nnu Ego but, on the whole, rather lacking in its long-term reward and satisfaction. Whether the changing character of motherhood is due to the influence of Western culture, the changing economic landscape of Lagos, or simply the cultural rift between rural and urban life is left for the reader to debate. It's probably a combination of all three.

What Emecheta does well is exploring the dynamics between husbands and wives, mothers and children, young women and men, and familial relations between men and women. In all these relationships there are sets of proscribed expectations for how men and women should behave. Making this even more complex is the fact that expectations for men and women differ between rural and urban settings, among the Ibo and the Yaruba, and between age groups.

For example, in village Ibuzo, men find power through wealth in people. That is, polygamy and numerous male offspring. Men claim "good" children as their own, yet deny "bad children" and blame their misbehavior on the mother's indiscretions. Traditionally, men proved themselves through toilsome farm work and hunting and those actions shaped lean, muscular bodies that women associated with manliness. In Lagos, however, men scramble to survive through meaningless wage labor. Nnaife, Ego's second husband, washes his white mistresses' knickers, is rotund, and generally unkempt. For Nnu Ego, Nnaife is utterly repulsive yet desirable because he can fulfill her dreams of motherhood. Whereas rural Ibo men attended to their personal chis (gods) those in Lagos practiced a native Christianity that allowed polygamy and made room for indigenous cultural expression. The belief that men also needed many offspring still held in Lagos.

Both men and women operated under the assumption that children would mature into working adults that would then provide for their aging and ailing parents in their retirement. The "joys of motherhood" refers to this process by which women invest their energy, spirit, and sweat into raising children into responsible men and women with the expectation that the male children (who may become major political figures through their educational pursuits) will support their parents in old age. Unfortunately, Nnu Ego never sees this cyclical vision of life come into fruition.

There's a number of other dynamics in this book. It's deep and rich with insight about Nigerian life, and should provoke thoughtful discussion and comparison/contrast with Western ideals of femininity and masculinity. Highly recommended.