Full of intimate stories, from chasing down secret love affairs to battling body image and struggling with familial strife, Pageboy is a love letter to the power of being seen. With this evocative and lyrical debut, Oscar-nominated star Elliot Page captures the universal human experience of searching for ourselves and our place in this complicated world.
“Can I kiss you?” It was two months before the world premiere of Juno, and Elliot Page was in his first ever queer bar. The hot summer air hung heavy around him as he looked at her. And then it happened. In front of everyone. A previously unfathomable experience. Here he was on the precipice of discovering himself as a queer person, as a trans person. Getting closer to his desires, his dreams, himself, without the repression he’d carried for so long. But for Elliot, two steps forward had always come with one step …
Full of intimate stories, from chasing down secret love affairs to battling body image and struggling with familial strife, Pageboy is a love letter to the power of being seen. With this evocative and lyrical debut, Oscar-nominated star Elliot Page captures the universal human experience of searching for ourselves and our place in this complicated world.
“Can I kiss you?” It was two months before the world premiere of Juno, and Elliot Page was in his first ever queer bar. The hot summer air hung heavy around him as he looked at her. And then it happened. In front of everyone. A previously unfathomable experience. Here he was on the precipice of discovering himself as a queer person, as a trans person. Getting closer to his desires, his dreams, himself, without the repression he’d carried for so long. But for Elliot, two steps forward had always come with one step back.
With Juno’s massive success, Elliot became one of the world’s most beloved actors. His dreams were coming true, but the pressure to perform suffocated him. He was forced to play the part of the glossy young starlet, a role that made his skin crawl, on and off set. The career that had been an escape out of his reality and into a world of imagination was suddenly a nightmare.
As he navigated criticism and abuse from some of the most powerful people in Hollywood, a past that snapped at his heels, and a society dead set on forcing him into a binary, Elliot often stayed silent, unsure of what to do. Until enough was enough.
The Oscar-nominated star who captivated the world with his performance in Juno finally shares his story in a groundbreaking and inspiring memoir about love, family, fame — and stepping into who we truly are with strength, joy and connection.
It's a very tough read/listen in places because unfortunately, Elliot Page had to deal with a lot of emotional abuse as a kid/teen and queerphobia later on. It was truly shocking to me to hear about the attitudes in Hollywood not that long ago. The book conveys the struggles and the difficult journey of trans persons really well, in an almost tangible way. In the end, I found myself cheering along when Elliot finally gets his top surgery. On a sidenote, I also learned a lot about Canada and Canadian history.
This was a tough read but I’m finding it invaluable to read memoirs from other trans people. Elliot shares his battle with dysphoria in Hollywood and how ingrained the queerphobia and sexism is; but also the friendship and joy they have had on their journey:
> I was being told to lie and hide. It puzzled me to watch cis straight actors play queer and trans characters and be revered. Nominations, wins, people exclaiming, “How brave!”
> “Keep your personal life private, that is what I tell all my clients,” my manager would instruct me, while the same clients walked the red carpet with a spouse or came out as heterosexual in an interview. Being arm in arm walking down the street in paparazzi photos was a natural phenomenon, even encouraged for publicity.
This was a tough read but I’m finding it invaluable to read memoirs from other trans people. Elliot shares his battle with dysphoria in Hollywood and how ingrained the queerphobia and sexism is; but also the friendship and joy they have had on their journey:
> I was being told to lie and hide. It puzzled me to watch cis straight actors play queer and trans characters and be revered. Nominations, wins, people exclaiming, “How brave!”
> “Keep your personal life private, that is what I tell all my clients,” my manager would instruct me, while the same clients walked the red carpet with a spouse or came out as heterosexual in an interview. Being arm in arm walking down the street in paparazzi photos was a natural phenomenon, even encouraged for publicity.
He's gone through so much hardship in his life just to reach a place where he feels a level of stability that I take for granted every day. It was an honor to read about his journey and to learn more about his life.
Highly recommended! Each chapter is a story, but the book jumps around in time. It's not a linear story because it reads like somebody telling their story; some chapters could have started with "That reminds me of the time...". While I'm non-trans myself, I remembered some similar situations in my life when I was told to shut down my authentic self so other people wouldn't be uncomfortable, so those moments in his life really connected with me.
Some of it was tough to read, and I had to take a few breaks after particularly emotionally charged chapters, but because I knew he finds himself in the end, I kept coming back. It definitely highlighted for me how fast the world is (and isn't) advancing toward inclusion and acceptance. It's emotional, and sometimes heartbreaking; but in the end, Pageboy is a triumphant story of a boy who slowly learned to love …
Highly recommended! Each chapter is a story, but the book jumps around in time. It's not a linear story because it reads like somebody telling their story; some chapters could have started with "That reminds me of the time...". While I'm non-trans myself, I remembered some similar situations in my life when I was told to shut down my authentic self so other people wouldn't be uncomfortable, so those moments in his life really connected with me.
Some of it was tough to read, and I had to take a few breaks after particularly emotionally charged chapters, but because I knew he finds himself in the end, I kept coming back. It definitely highlighted for me how fast the world is (and isn't) advancing toward inclusion and acceptance. It's emotional, and sometimes heartbreaking; but in the end, Pageboy is a triumphant story of a boy who slowly learned to love himself as a man.
Raw, personal, and honest: a memoir of transition and survival by someone who has been in the public eye for most of his life but never really seen. There's no sanitized veneer to his writing, and my life is better for having read his story. I hope his life is better for having written it.
