This is a very fun book. It sometimes takes too broad brushes to paint research results' implications for our lives. But it's a very efficient way to help parents understand their toddlers and embrace that part of life. The summaries of "toddlers' teachings" at the end of each chapter oscillate between being way too generic and useful advice.
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EmelineB's books
2025 Reading Goal
26% complete! EmelineB has read 26 of 100 books.
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EmelineB finished reading The Indifferent Stars Above by Daniel James Brown

The Indifferent Stars Above by Daniel James Brown
In April of 1846, Sarah Graves was twenty-one and in love with a young man who played the violin. But …
EmelineB finished reading Children of the city by David Nasaw

Children of the city by David Nasaw
It was the turn of the 20th century--a time of explosive growth for American cities, a time of nascent hopes …
EmelineB finished reading Nightbitch by Rachel Yoder

Nightbitch by Rachel Yoder
One day, the mother was a mother but then, one night, she was quite suddenly something else...
At home full-time …
EmelineB wants to read Wedding People by Alison Espach
EmelineB finished reading Crafting the Ballets Russes : Music, Dance, Design by Lynn Garafola
EmelineB finished reading Rejection by Tony Tulathimutte

Rejection by Tony Tulathimutte
e-audiobook
Review of 'Sleep Well, Take Risks, Squish the Peas' on 'Goodreads'
4 stars
EmelineB reviewed Attachments by Lucas Mann
Review of 'Attachments' on 'Goodreads'
4 stars
Some thoughts in progress: Reflections and essays on fatherhood by fathers are rare, and this book stands out in that regard. It leaves me with a diffuse feeling. There were lots of insights and pearls, I really appreciated seeing how dads' online media is perceived, I loved that essay about Brad Pitt, and some of the playground anecdotes. But I can't tell that I retain a particular argument.
EmelineB reviewed Winner by Teddy Wayne
Review of 'Winner' on 'Goodreads'
5 stars
I almost stopped reading after the first 50 pages or so - thinking this was too bad-romance-novel for me. The minutiae of covid-era precautions felt over played, although I do remember them (and still practice them to an extent). It would have been a mistake. Because someone I trust recommended it I kept reading, eventually leaning in the discomfort, very much intended by the author, and quite well done. It reminds me in many ways of Maupassant's Bel-Ami. Still thinking about it - would recommend but advise you might need to persist for the rewards.
EmelineB reviewed BoyMom by Ruth Whippman
Review of 'BoyMom' on 'Goodreads'
3 stars
I really wanted to like this book, and it makes lots of good and important arguments. Of particular interest, the research on how biological specificity (such as brain areas developing at different times) of baby boys meets Western bias, leading to boys receiving less attention and affection from their parents. It also covers well different aspects of "modern masculinity" from the incels community, to the difficulty of changing the culture around sex after #metoo without ostracizing kids making mistakes.
I'm however struck by how negatively the book describes boys and the physicality of children, especially in the memoir part; and by the lack of discussion around ADHD, the increasing prescription of Ritalin and how this plays in a culture of performance that is detrimental to all children. There's no denying Ritalin helps some children. But there are tons of discussions around the over-diagnosis of boys, especially non-white boys, and how …
I really wanted to like this book, and it makes lots of good and important arguments. Of particular interest, the research on how biological specificity (such as brain areas developing at different times) of baby boys meets Western bias, leading to boys receiving less attention and affection from their parents. It also covers well different aspects of "modern masculinity" from the incels community, to the difficulty of changing the culture around sex after #metoo without ostracizing kids making mistakes.
I'm however struck by how negatively the book describes boys and the physicality of children, especially in the memoir part; and by the lack of discussion around ADHD, the increasing prescription of Ritalin and how this plays in a culture of performance that is detrimental to all children. There's no denying Ritalin helps some children. But there are tons of discussions around the over-diagnosis of boys, especially non-white boys, and how it affects them long term. When tying personal experience so tightly in the argument... these kind of questions need to be better addressed.
I was also (as the mother of a boy) disappointed by how being physically active is always seen through the lens of boyhood, and not discussed through:
- the lack of playground and outdoor spaces
- the lack of school designs enabling movement
- the lack of outdoor preschool options following best recommendations for that age (motor coordination is the substrate for socio-emotional regulation in early childhood!)
- that there are tons of concerns about children's lack of physical activity and their poor motor skills development, resulting from a lack of support for motor experiences in childhood
Good on boys for wanting more playful, active environments! What if instead of focusing on children fitting immediately and neatly in adults-like environments, we embraced play? I'm sad for the girls described in the book as better because they sit still, wondering if they were offered a chance to play.
The book is surprisingly essentialist despite itself, and illustrates issues I've run into again and again: any mistake my toddler makes is interpreted as due to boyhood, but the exact same behavior from his friends who are girls is interpreted as normal development. I was hoping the book would avoid this pitfall, but it doesn't.
(I might have more thoughts later)
EmelineB reviewed Triste tigre by Neige Sinno
EmelineB reviewed When You Care by Elissa Strauss
Review of 'When You Care' on 'Goodreads'
5 stars
I read this book in one sitting with a 20 months old - definitely something every parent should read.
I'll get back to this review later, but this is the first book in my reading-about-parenthood streak that articulates its transcendent quality. Like the author, all that was ever told me about parenthood is that you love your kids but the actual work is dehumanizing, breaks your brain, is boring, and the list goes on. When I became a parent, I honestly couldn't understand why others spoke of it so negatively, lest they were tradwives. My experience of full-time parenthood has largely been fascinating. And I've never quite managed to articulate how awe-inspiring it is. This book did that, and I am grateful for it.