Hardcover, 228 pages
English language
Published July 12, 2022 by Flatiron Books.
Leah is changed. Months earlier, she left for a routine expedition, only this time her submarine sank to the sea floor. When she finally surfaces and returns home, her wife Miri knows that something is wrong. Barely eating and lost in her thoughts, Leah rotates between rooms in their apartment, running the taps morning and night.
As Miri searches for answers, desperate to understand what happened below the water, she must face the possibility that the woman she loves is slipping from her grasp.
This book really took its time. The slow unwinding made me read it at a much less frenetic pace. It was the opposite of a page turner but the experience was so rewarding.
I caught themes of relationships changing as people move apart but don't want to let go. Also, the slow loss of someone you love to a degenerative disease. And of course, loneliness. This would be a great winter read.
So this is good and also sad. Also a little boring. But not as boring as it could be. It does have exciting moments and things do happen, just, they are small in all this stuckness.
I'm sure you can read this as a metaphor for the impact of trauma on queer relationships. Maybe I half do. But also. It's about submarines and unknowable threats and soft domesticity and fun facts about the sea.
Huh. But also, wow. I think I'll have to marinate on this one a bit more before I can give a solid review. but initial thoughts are: What a stunning, tragic, and beautiful book. But also... I'm not sure I liked it?
I knew this was a vibes book going into it, and I actually DNFed it on a first attempt. I don’t regret finishing it this time, but I had hoped for something more.
I liked the weird, unsettling mood throughout the story. I don’t mind the ambiguity at all, if anything I wanted more ambiguity at the end. But it felt so, so samey through the whole book. It didn’t feel like it built toward the climax that we got, it was just suddenly there.
The writing style also leans lyrical, full of a metaphors. I think that’s why I DNFed it the first time, but this time I read it via audiobook so it was easier to get through. Still not my preference.
It was short so it felt serviceable, but it’s a literary author taking genre elements (deep sea creepiness and sketchy science organizations), and not doing anything …
I knew this was a vibes book going into it, and I actually DNFed it on a first attempt. I don’t regret finishing it this time, but I had hoped for something more.
I liked the weird, unsettling mood throughout the story. I don’t mind the ambiguity at all, if anything I wanted more ambiguity at the end. But it felt so, so samey through the whole book. It didn’t feel like it built toward the climax that we got, it was just suddenly there.
The writing style also leans lyrical, full of a metaphors. I think that’s why I DNFed it the first time, but this time I read it via audiobook so it was easier to get through. Still not my preference.
It was short so it felt serviceable, but it’s a literary author taking genre elements (deep sea creepiness and sketchy science organizations), and not doing anything especially interesting or new with them.
Content warning Meta spoiler, nehmen aber das Ende vorweg
Dad Buch hält leider keine Überraschungen bereit, es endet genau so, wie man sich das auf den ersten Seiten denkt. Das thematisiert das Buch aber auch selbst, wenn Leah feststellt, dass man bei Horrorfilmen, in denen es um Geister/Werwölfe/… geht, einfach damit rechnen kann, dass die Hauptperson spätestens am Ende auch eine solche Kreatur (geworden) ist. Das ist übrigens eine Prämisse, die ich in Horrorliteratur außerordentlich schätze. Ich mag es nicht, wenn sich von ein „Monatern“ abgegrenzt wird, statt mit ihnen gemein gemacht oder sich selbst darin erkannt. Aber zurück zum Buch. Wie erwartet werden Zusammenhänge nicht aufgeklärt, die Entitäten bleiben kafkaesk nebulös und unerreichbar, vielleicht ist alles ein Missverständnis, vielleicht genau so, wie sich manche Charaktere das vorstellen. Ich finde sowas ja immer schade und billige Ausflucht, andererseits wäre es sonst kein Horror mehr sondern ginge in Richtung Krimi/Action und man hätte eindeutige Bösewicht_innen statt Atmosphäre und Introspektion.
Das eigentliche Thema des Buchs ist mE aber Trauer. Denn es ist gar nicht klar, ob diese Geschichte mit den zwei Frauen überhaupt so passiert, oder ob eigentlich nur Maria (natürlich heißt sie Maria :D, mir ist das Buch ja n Tacken zu christlich in den Metaphern) einfach nur durch den Tod der entfremdeten Mutter die Realität entgleitet. Respektive genau das ein zweites Mal passiert, erst mit der Mutter, dann mit dem Verschwinden und eventuellen Wiederauftauchens von Leah, wobei ja auch im Buch (das eher mit dem ganzen Zaun winkt als mit einem Zaunpfahl) ausgesprochen wird, dass die Angehörigen von Verschwundenen eigentlich diejenigen sind, die diese erst töten/sich entscheiden müssen, was passiert (ist). Tja, also viel Trauer, viel Entfremdung von Hetenwelt, ein wenig das Thematisieren queerer Symbiose. Nicht schlecht aber auch nicht wirklich mitreißend. Einerseits weil vorhersehbar andererseits weil beide Protagonist_innen so gänzlich abgeklärt erzählen und die Sprecherinnen des Hörbuchs das noch verstärken. Kann man sich mal anhören, aber ich hätte gerne eine 50% kürzere Version gehört ;).
I don't know what the fuck i just read
More of a 3 star book but I’m bumping up a star because I think if it’s read as a metaphor for all marriages, rather than just a story about one marriage, it’s rather profound. I’m choosing to read it that way. If you read it the other way…. It’s kind of boring. The style is familiar and at this point, almost cliche. That’s not so great. But it’s short enough that I don’t mind as much as I would if it had taken more of my time. It’s a decent book. I could see recommending it as a good introduction to contemporary literary fiction, if nothing else. It has just enough innovation going on to make it a little more interesting than other options.
Though it was slow at times, this was such visceral read. Left me feeling raw.
