224 pages
Published Feb. 5, 2019 by Graywolf Press.
'Dazzling ... in her kaleidoscopic essays, memoir has been shattered into sliding and overlapping pieces ... mind-expanding' The New York Times Book Review
Esmé Weijun Wang was officially diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder in 2013, although the hallucinations and psychotic episodes had started years before that. In the midst of a high functioning life at Yale, Stanford and the literary world, she would find herself floored by an overwhelming terror that 'spread like blood', or convinced that she was dead, or that her friends were robots, or spiders were eating holes in her brain. What happens when your whole conception of yourself is turned upside down? When you're aware of what is occurring to you, but unable to do anything about it?
Written with immediacy and unflinching honesty, this visceral and moving book is Wang's story, as she steps both inside and outside of her condition to bring it to light. …
'Dazzling ... in her kaleidoscopic essays, memoir has been shattered into sliding and overlapping pieces ... mind-expanding' The New York Times Book Review
Esmé Weijun Wang was officially diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder in 2013, although the hallucinations and psychotic episodes had started years before that. In the midst of a high functioning life at Yale, Stanford and the literary world, she would find herself floored by an overwhelming terror that 'spread like blood', or convinced that she was dead, or that her friends were robots, or spiders were eating holes in her brain. What happens when your whole conception of yourself is turned upside down? When you're aware of what is occurring to you, but unable to do anything about it?
Written with immediacy and unflinching honesty, this visceral and moving book is Wang's story, as she steps both inside and outside of her condition to bring it to light. Following her own diagnosis and the many manifestations of schizophrenia in her life, she ranges over everything from how we label mental illness to her own use of fashion and make-up to present herself as high-functioning, from the failures of the higher education system to how factors such as PTSD and Lyme disease compounded her experiences. Wang's analytical, intelligent eye, honed as a former lab researcher at Stanford, allows her to balance research with haunting personal narrative. The Collected Schizophrenias cuts right to the core and provides unique insight into a condition long misdiagnosed and much misunderstood.
Essays on the author's experience of schizophrenia (along with bipolar, PTSD & chronic Lyme!) in the US. Fascinating & unsettling view into psychiatric hospitals, mental health 'support' in Ivy League colleges, and what the hell a psychotic break feels like. Blimey.
I enjoyed this a lot. There are memoir aspects to this, but it also reads as educational non-fiction. It strikes the perfect balance for me. I don't enjoy a lot of memoirs, but this was non-memoir enough to work for me. I recognize that the exact opposite will true for many other readers!
Wang writes about her experience very matter-of-factly, but wow. I can't imagine.
I really enjoyed the last essay which describes her openness to alternative medicine and spiritual practices. I feel like I've come full circle on that kind of thing. Starting out spiritual, becoming less spiritual, and then being open to more spiritual again. I can relate to where she's at in that essay.
I do not struggle with anything /nearly/ as difficult as Wang, but I have long dealt with migraines that result in aphasia and visual disturbances. Thankfully, I have late in life discovered that …
I enjoyed this a lot. There are memoir aspects to this, but it also reads as educational non-fiction. It strikes the perfect balance for me. I don't enjoy a lot of memoirs, but this was non-memoir enough to work for me. I recognize that the exact opposite will true for many other readers!
Wang writes about her experience very matter-of-factly, but wow. I can't imagine.
I really enjoyed the last essay which describes her openness to alternative medicine and spiritual practices. I feel like I've come full circle on that kind of thing. Starting out spiritual, becoming less spiritual, and then being open to more spiritual again. I can relate to where she's at in that essay.
I do not struggle with anything /nearly/ as difficult as Wang, but I have long dealt with migraines that result in aphasia and visual disturbances. Thankfully, I have late in life discovered that caffeine is a huge trigger for me. I'm very lucky to now be able to avoid migraines largely by avoiding caffeine. But that journey of trying to figure out what triggers an episode, what medications will help, hating the life disruption of the illness, that's familiar. I think anyone who deals with chronic illness or difficult to diagnose/treat illnesses will relate to Wang.
strange, sparse, menacing
Excellent collection. Insight after insight, great writing.
I think this is one of my favorite nonfiction books of all time, and definitely one of the most important memoirs on mental health that I've ever read.
TW/CW for rape, sexual assault, and CSA/pedophile mention in "John Doe, Psychosis" chapter
