When Breath Becomes Air

I feel icky giving low ratings to memoirs and biographies, but I just can't bring myself to give more than 3 stars for this one.

It was interesting to be able to see life through the lens of a neurosurgeon. But I felt like there were few moments where I was actually learning about what Paul went through, what he learned, what he truly felt. It lacked the emotion that I expected with someone coming to terms with knowing that their life will be short-lived and trying to move along with that. I learned far more in the afterword from his wife than I did in the entire book.

I also just have a particular dislike for people who decide to have kids when they know one parent will not be alive to see that child grow past being a toddler. It's not my life, and people should live how they want, but I just really don't like seeing it being done and glorified like it's some amazing thing when that child will be dealing with the trauma of never knowing a parent for their whole life.

Overall, this felt like an acquaintance just quickly trying to tell you what they've been going through, and they're not comfortable enough to really let you know how they're doing and what's really going on.

Small book, liked how the chapters were designed

A hard read coz, 1. Author reflection on self, time & again 2. Is philosophical sometimes 3. Literary references & impressive vocabulary 4. Description of medical conditions & procedures 5. May bring memories if you've cared for someone at hospital 6. Wrote this from death bed 7. A few recurring thoughts

Relatable in, 1. 1st(?) gen Indian-American 2. How a doctor's profession is a job 3. Simple & honest views

A very good read. Strong recommendation.

Left me with these questions, How do you judge a book written by someone from his death bed? How many untold stories could there be of people less fortunate? (Not as rich, no access to quality healthcare, not educated to better understand a disease, not a doctor (the quality of treatment gets better when one is either very rich or in the know-how of the business, not in usa, not with a family, not married etc)

Severe illness is not life-altering, it's life-shattering. Less of an epiphany and more like someone had just firebombed the path forward.


There is no hiding from death. This book certainly doesn't shy away from the message. I feel this will not really be a spoiler, as you'll learn in the preface, the author is no longer alive.

Speaking of the preface - there is a phrase that repeatedly came to my mind as I read this book - a prose poem. Do not be mistaken, there's very little actual poetry in this book (though there is some), but the prose has that quality, rhythm, cadence and urgency to continue with the next line.

I found the writing brilliant. At times full of gore and action of surgery, only to be replaced with serenity of a quiet dinner with friends. This might be a book about dying, but it is full of life. It's not a book about cancer, being a doctor nor is a full-on patient story of fight for survival. But it is all of those and more.

For me personally - It's a beautiful philosophical book on how to live and die on your own terms. Finding out who/what is important to you, and finding the courage within you to get up each day and fight for it. Realizing that priorities change and that's OK.

I am quite sure I will read this again in the future.

A thoughtful and deeply moving memoir that forces one to ponder and confront their own mortality. In some ways, Kalanithi's memoir reminded me of the memoirs of Ulysses S. Grant, as both men were furiously writing within a limited time frame imposed by terminal cancers. Both men were also reflecting back on their lives, assessing mistakes, acknowledging failures and successes, making amends, and perfectly cognizant that their work would likely be published posthumously.

Kalanithi had his life mapped out. He was preparing to exit an arduous and long residency in neurosurgery and all but had his dream job sealed up--becoming a neurosurgeon-neuroscientist at Stanford. But then when the unexpected occurred, a terminal lung-cancer diagnosis at thirty-six, he and his wife were forced not only to recalibrate their financial, marital, and career ambitions but had to fundamentally reconsider the meaning of life and, especially, of a life "well lived."

Honestly, I thought this was a great book to read near the conclusion of a tumultuous year where I dealt with a lot of professional and personal change in my life. It placed a lot of my problems in a better frame and reinforced that notion that life is often full of unexpected changes--some tragic, some wonderful--and we must learn to adapt and, to paraphrase Tolkien's Gandalf, chose what we are to do with the time we are given.